Why It’s Worth Livening Your Libido From Within
WHY IT’S WORTH LIVENING YOUR LIBIDO FROM WITHIN
MARCH 5, 2021
BY BEATRICE HAZLEHURST
‘Self-care’ took on new meaning in mandated self-seclusion. Beauty went minimalist, marijuana established itself as essential and sex, well, it moved center-stage.
Over the past year, sex has seen more mainstream media coverage than ever before. The overarching focus was on access: URL vs. IRL. When hook-up culture grinds to a halt overnight, the single seek their fix online. Premium porn saw unparalleled engagement, and digital dalliances — via dating apps or cam sites — reigned. As loneliness became increasingly endemic, those already or on the cusp of coupling watched as their relationships accelerated at a pace that defied or social standards., But that brought another reckoning: maintaining mystery in unprecedentedly close quarters.
Covid-19 closed the distance in my cross-coastal relationship. My (relatively new) boyfriend was visiting me in New York when the city shut down. I booked a flight to LA to match his return date to temporarily avoid living alone in lockdown. What was intended to be a two-week stint turned into a huge, entirely undiscussed next step in our relationship: moving in. On a whim, I had given up my apartment and social circle to relocate to California, unwittingly committing to a now-very serious relationship.
For two people suddenly sleeping, working and, oftentimes eating within the limited square footage of one room, the transition was relatively seamless. The key point of difference was sex. During the long-distance component of our relationship, our sex life oscillated from fasting and bingeing: zero to 60, and back to zero. Then, amid the Zoom calls, food breaks, workouts and cat-caring (yes, there’s now a cat), finding time for each other became less important. As romance sunk to the bottom of our list of priorities, our respective sex drives similarly lowered.
Judging by the statistics, we were not in a lull alone. Ashley Madison, a site infamous for facilitating infidelity, capped 2020 with six million new sign-ups — rounding out its membership at 70 million. Of that group, 95 percent of all AM members claimed to consider cheating throughout the pandemic a form of ‘self-care.’ While the numbers seem startling at a glance, they likely represent only a fraction of those who sought to mediate less sex with the promise of greener pastures last year. Then there are the couples who remain fully committed, and yet sex — or lack of it — still remains the proverbial elephant in the room.
So what are the options? There are always the traditional means of spicing things up — increased solo activities or introducing toys (I recommend We-Vibe and Womanizer) — but sometimes even experimentation can feel like overwhelming effort, which means help sparking desire to begin with can make all the difference. Enter pandemic pick-me-up: CBD. For many looking to avoid medical intervention, CBD’s ability to reduce inflammation and increase blood flow can provide motivation to head to the start line more regularly.
The industry standout is the CBD Libido capsules from Highline Wellness. Recommended to me by a friend who allegedly “devoured” her boyfriend, they contain plants Damiana, Maca and Ashwagandha, all well-known aphrodisiacs that also boast stress-relieving properties. These are particularly effective for women, and after only a few days of research, I can attest make a huge difference in both desire and natural lubrication. Implemented into a routine long-term, you and your partner might very well enjoy a full libido makeover.
It’s difficult to acknowledge — let alone seek out — external help when it comes to something as frequently stigmatized as sex, but burying inhibitions can have a huge pay-off.
While it’s all-too-easy to forget how regular orgasm can both foster connection with your partner and elevate other areas of your mental and physical wellness, it’s also important to remember relationships aren’t an endless reel of increasingly passionate romps. Everyone moves to a different rhythm — especially in an ever-shifting normal — but when there’s a will to utilize resources, there’s a way to rediscover excitement in close quarters. Take it from me (and CBD), the mystery can always re-materialize.
